An Exercise in Slaying the Perfectionist

I'm suffering from perfectionism right now.

I haven't blogged for many many months and it's because -- I think -- I've made a mountain out of a mole hill. Blogging is just journal writing, with a little more focus. But somehow I've built it up to being this big scary platform-building professional thing. And it's not. It really isn't. It's just a diary.

Sort of.

So, I made a deal with a member of my Mastermind Group that I'd blog for seven minutes today and post it. And then text him that I did. Accountability, yo.

Newsy Updates:

My garden is out of control. The front yard has gone all ghetto (which means it needs to be mowed and weeded and the carport needs to be organized, dusted and swept.) It's embarrassing to walk up or drive up to my house. The others around me are charming.

I might be insane enough to can some dill pickles this Saturday. I'll let you know if I do. And I'm going to start up the kombucha and jun again. Hooray!

I went on my first ever writer's retreat, which was divine. I had days and days of reading, napping, and revising my manuscript of Herbal Junction. And I got to re-connect with a lovely lady that means a lot to me.


My teens are starting up high school again next week, and I'm so glad to get back to my more regular routine. I love FALL!

What are your newsy updates?

A Time of Transition Requires a New Name

This blog started back in 2008 as a mommy blog. Or, more accurately, a place to compile the insanity of my life -- specifically with my son's undiagnosed PDD-NOS, and the unschooling/homeschooling adventures I had with him, and his sister.

The blog was aptly named Insane Parents Unite!

But now my kids are in middle-school. And you can't even buy parenting magazines geared towards kids that old. Not to mention that both my children refuse to be photographed, and what fun is a blog post about teenage angst, hunting for high schools, or the continual battle of limiting video gaming time when you can't even add a picture?!

Grumblegrumble.

So I changed the blog title to Indian-flavored Everything because I love all things Indian, was dating an Indian man, and I was running out of kid topics. (Which isn't really true, but whatever.) I still want to write about my favorite Bollywood movie, and the trip I'm dreaming up for Kerala with my new guy, but I also want to write about homesteading and reading and parenting older kids and cross-cultural dating. And hopefully in an artful-heartful way so that I may bring some joy to the soul along the way.

So now what do I call the blog?

***

And now for something not-so completely different ... I will be starting a BRAND NEW BLOG within the next month (in addition to this one). Something along the lines of Eco Expat. I've bought some land in Costa Rica at an Eco Village (off the grid, self-sustainable, intentional community) and I want to chronicle my experience of readying myself for life in a foreign country, earning income in a foreign country, learning a new language, practicing my homesteading skills -- plus all the logistical things I didn't anticipate happening but I'm sure will.

Stop by here for a link to the new blog.

Pura Vida!

Homesteading Nostalgia

I was feeling nostalgic for my suburban homesteading days, so I thought I'd put up a few pictures I'd taken a couple years back.

I just put some of my meager savings into a deposit on some land in Costa Rica. (!!!!) Current plan is still to move there after the kids are out of school. Will start practicing self-sustainable practices now in anticipation. :)

Bicycle Power

Bicycle-Powered Blender!!!

I love it!

I want one.

We went to Bite of Eugene at Alton Baker Park yesterday and lots of local food vendors showed up. It was an interesting break from the almost constant tv/computer viewing my children have been coercing me into.

These smoothies were free to passersby but have yogurt in them. I asked if it was possible to just make the next batch with apple juice and the fruit and leave the dairy out so Robert could drink some. They were totally game, and even rinsed out the blender to make sure there wasn't any yogurt residue.

Shortly after they started doing it, another woman walked up asking the same thing. :) Serendipity.

Robert quite enjoyed helping to prepare the smoothie.

Then some free jumping!

Even Aubrey partook.

       And here is my non-sequitor photo.

I had planned a solid week of sewing last week. All the children and myself are short of summer clothes and I have all the fabric and notions at my fingertips. So on day one I sat down and sewed up these shorts for Robert within two hours. They are completely huge. But he still wants them.

Alas, I haven't sewn since (and that was seven days ago.)

Suburban Notes

So, I'm on a quest to shop more frugally and to not waste food in our home. I find uneaten yogurt and left-overs in my fridge growing their own gardens, and the produce I bring home gets wrinkly and soft.

I think this is more meat than I've bought in two months and I got it all on one day. Ick. But my naturopath says I need way more protein than I'm getting and wants me to eat 100grams of carbs a day. I don't think that's even possible for a human being, is it? (shaking my head) I don't really want to know the answer to that.

Plus Paul's been told that he's pre-pre-pre-diabetic. So to lay off the carbs and eat more protein. Sigh. So, more meat. Blah.

Other news on the farm, we've added a new tenant on the weekends. She's got an amazing personality, is a fantastic webpage designer and photographer, and is helping me with my food budget.

We also have a couple other tenants leaving. They have found a bigger space closer to downtown that will suit them much better. They've been great tenants and we're sorry to see them go, but wish them grand adventures and good energy in their lives.

On the garden and chicken homefront, I've decided to free-range the girls a bit here and there. I mean, they already are free-ranged, but I want them to have the run of the yard, too. That doesn't work with our space (and having a maniac puppy dog that wants to eat them), so I'll just have them out when we are gone and the puppy's in the crate anyway, or for a couple hours a day where I can monitor the dog closely.

This is Sophia. She's the noisiest booger-head in the world.

I've signed up for the Willamette Writer's Conference for the third year in a row and was sorry to discover that I'd registered too late to get the agents that would be best for my book. So, I'll be pitching to agents that I'm not as confident will like my proposal/book.

But I'm so excited about going again. I always come home renewed to write and with lots of platform and web-presence ideas. My mother-in-law is going with me this year (she's got two books to pitch). So I'll be "traveling" with her again.

Things seem to be constantly on the brink of change around here. It's exciting and overwhelming.

Our local DAN (Defeat Autism Now) doctor is recommending that Robert see a doctor in Portland, so I'll be calling her soon. Robert's been on the gluten-free, casein-free diet for just over three weeks and I've noticed subtle differences in his behavior. He seems to be more .... even-keeled, if that makes any sense. Though right now, we are experiencing heavy outbursts regarding the diet. He is completely freaked about staying on the diet. All his favorite foods are affected. Beer Cheese soup, Roasted Red-Pepper Soup, ice cream, candy, Naan bread, Chicken Tikka Masala, corn dogs, and cheese sandwiches. Poor kid.

So, tantrum city.

A couple of friends have suggested that he is detoxing and that is the flare-ups in behavior I'm seeing. I hope he settles down soon.

School starts in three months for him, and I want to have more facts and routines under our belt to make his transition from unschooling to Village School a success.

What else?

Paul and I are visiting Costa Rica this Fall to check out the area. We may even stay this place he found: Osa Mountain Village.

We're also looking into purchasing a business. Once the kids are both in school this September, I will need to pick up some work to help pay tuition for Aubrey's school. So, I could go the part-time route and write the other part of the time. Or we could start a business, enabling Paul to switch careers in the near future and then we could either work together at it (which would be fun), or it could be mostly him working it and I can write full-time. (Which would be dope, as my friend says.)

So, big changes and opportunities.

May they all be entered upon with the least amount of drama and stress.

Amen and Blessed Be.

Realizing Dreams and ADD Coaches

Picking one thing means not picking another. At least at that set of moments in time.

This is why it's difficult for me to choose between projects.

I'm lying in bed on a morning where the chickens (it must be Sophia, the little wanker -- can hens be wankers, or can that only be reserved for roosters?) have woken me before six in the morning. Wanker. I fetched my rain/muck boots with the purpley stripes from the garage. Usually they are kept on the back patio but I'd used them recently working on the restoration of a butterfly meadow at a nearby park. We're working on our spring community service badge through SpiralScouts.

But I digress.

I grab my boots and a canister of organic chicken feed and head outside. The air smells sweet and of newly washed rain. I feed them and check for eggs. None. Stingy bastards. If they're going to wake me before six in the morning, the least they can do is gift me some eggs for my troubles.

I spill some food, swear, scoop poop and then come inside and wash my hands vigorously.

Now what?

The hot tub would be nice, but what if I stay too long and I don't get Aubrey up and ready for school on time. I could go back to bed, but Paul's already up and that cut down on half the incentive to sink back under the covers. I could write in my journal, or read.

Reading sounds too tiring so I sit on the side of the bed and take my thyroid medication and see how it is to be back in bed. Was I too restless to be here? No. My glasses are on now just in case I decide to journal, but I slide back into my sheets.

Mmmm.

I close my eyes and snuggle with Humphrey who has gotten onto the bed. Wanker. But I let him, so I can't complain too much.

I don't fall back to sleep. Instead I plan and dream and paint pictures in my head. With purple and blue blobs that flow out of my fingertips and sable brushes. I think of my knitting project I am currently working on (a stripey set of fingerless gloves from left over wool yarn that will match my newly knitted hat), future knitting projects I can't wait to start (a felted bag, socks and an afghan), and the eleven sewing projects I just bought all the fabric and notions and patterns for. Clothes for the kids and me.

I also think of personal projects I'm up against. How to connect to others when they don't want to, or can't for some reason.

There's a friend that isn't so much a friend anymore that I miss. She says she likes me but she has a hard time with my energy -- my creativity she likes, but the rest is too scattered and shaky for her to be around comfortably. I swallow harder when I remember this. It's hard to slough this off when a) it is something that is not likely to change about me, as it's fairly core value stuff we're talking about here and apparently it's my core value she's not digging, and b) that I see her in passing a couple times a week when she drops off her kids at the same school I drop one of mine at.

And people closer still, that I reach out for and am met with love, respect and tenderness, but not closeness.

And then there's the house. You know about my house and how much I feel prisoner to its clutter and chaos. I'm ever trying to corral its mutations and fail miserably. I read an interesting bit of information from a book called something like: ADD-friendly ways to organize your life/home. It's advice was basically you allow yourself your faults and limitations and you hire coaches. You categorize all your needs and assign them Level 1, 2 or 3.

If one of your tasks is a Level I, maybe a weekly email from a friend would suffice for the reminder to do this thing. They're jobs that you can really do yourself, you just need a bit of momentum.

Level 2 tasks require that a coach actually be in your house. They sit with you and drink tea and remind you of what you were doing after you are done with the phone call, or the dog smears muddy paw prints on the wood floor and you rush to wipe them up before they harden. I would need a coach to keep me on track to file paperwork that's accumulated over the years in three rubbermaid totes. Or folding socks.

And Level 3 tasks are pointless. You will not do them. Best just hire a professional to come and do it for you.

Aspects of this book really make sense to me. Therefore, I've enlisted the help of my friend, Kesha, to come and help me de-clutter my house. Officially. Until it's done. I want half the house gone. We simply have too much stuff in the house for it to be all put away. There actually are not places for these things. So they must go.

After Aubrey and Paul leave and I shower, Kesha comes over and we walk around the house with a clipboard and brainstorm things to get rid of, systems that need changing and objects that need purchasing in order to make said systems work.

She's committed to coming over about twice a week to help me accomplish this feat before June 25 -- a quasi-self-imposed deadline for a benefit garage sale for our SpiralScouts circle.

After the house is a cozy, safe haven that all members of the family want to come home to ... Kesha has agreed (though I'm not sure she remembers she agreed to this) to continue on as my "ADD" coach (for lack of a better term). She can help me accomplish my creative goals by just being there and re-focusing me. Mostly this will be done jointly.

For instance, I've had three garbage bags of raw, dirty sheep wool in my garage for almost a year. Yum. Bet you didn't think I'd say that.

I got it free from a farm sanctuary after just teaching myself to knit and discovering how expensive knitting can be. Nice yarn can get spendy.

So my intent was to wash this grubby, sweaty sheep fur (oh, excuse me: fiber) and card it and spin it and knit with it. And if that wasn't enough challenge for me, I could dye it before spinning it, too.

Well, as I've said, it's still in the garage untouched.

So, Kesha totally wants to do this with me. So we'll do this project together and it'll be a win/win situation. She'll get all the raw materials she wants and a friend to do it with her, and I get ... well, the same as her BUT the added benefit of a coach that will keep me on track.

For awhile I couldn't wrap my head around being the kind of person that needed people to tell me what to do. This didn't sit well with me AT ALL. I liked the free-spirit, chaotic neutral, artistic image of myself and being a submissive follower didn't fit into that. But then it occurred to me.

I know what I want. I even know how to get there. I just need help staying on task in order to realize my dreams.

On the Homefront

So I'm really despising my youngest dog right now.

Notice anything about this line of raspberry plants? Like maybe the one in the middle is missing?

And this hole is an example of the three others that used to have three huckleberry plants and one blueberry plant. All those plants were also pulled up by the roots and shredded.

And this feels like the worst of it. This was my sweet little pear tree. As you can see, some animal (most likely Humphrey) pushed the chicken wire down, pushed over the tree, and ripped off all the branches and leaves.

Sigh. I don't know what to do about it. The front yard is for smaller plants and vegetables and flowers. The backyard was allotted for the fruit trees and bushes. Things that wouldn't fit in the front garden. I ache that six fruit bearing plants are gone (right on the cusp of the "landscape artist" that removed about eighty percent of my strawberry plants and all my raspberry canes! because they were invasive) and want to replace them right away. But that will be COSTLY!!! Not to mention that I don't know how to prevent Humphrey (or whatever did this) from striking again.

It's quite depressing actually. But I suppose even small suburban "farms" have losses, so I'll just pick up the pieces and start over on the fruit bearing plants. Again.

On a nicer note: we've acquired three new chickens. With the promise of them being good layers. Two chickens (the allotted amount allowed in the city limits) just wasn't enough to supply the eggs that our six person household uses.

Especially when Hazel starts brooding. Hens don't lay eggs when they are brooding. And she seems prone to it. I have to pull her out of the nesting box a couple times a day just to get her to eat. And when I reach for her she fluffs up huge. Trying to look bigger for predator me, I guess.

This is Sophia. One of the new ladies. She's a screecher. She goes kinda velociraptor in the mornings. I hope the neighbors won't be upset by these new additions.

I broke out the food dehydrator for the first time the other day. My friend Jenny gave this to me after she replaced it with a newer, snazzier model. It was a fun and yummy experience. We had a bowl full of too ripe fruit and I hated the idea of how much food I WAY TOO OFTEN throw away, so Robert and I chopped and sliced up two pears, three apples and three bananas. Yummy!

And Robert is feeling a little more artistic these days with his markers. I try to encourage art as much as possible for him because a) I love art and want my kids to express themselves in this way, too, and b) I sense that he finds it difficult to express his needs, desires and thoughts ... so maybe he could do it through his art. The kicker seems to be that he only wants to use these dry erasers and the wipe-it board. A lesson in impermanence for me! I like saving art work and have a bin in the garage with my favorites through the years. But he isn't creating anything permanent for me to keep. So, I thought I would start taking pictures of his art, thereby making it "permanent" for me. (He's also hating pictures taken of himself. He gets extremely pissed when I sneak in a picture of him.)

This rainbow is the most positive piece of art he's created in a year. He usually draws monsters, fight scenes, people being abducted or possessed by some otherworldly substance ... things like that.

I'm still waiting to hear back from Therapy Solutions for Kids about getting his O.T. started again.

And I have to say, that since Aubrey has been back to school (a private one Paul and I picked out for her: Eugene Waldorf School), she has been ecstatic both at home and at school, AND Robert and I have slipped back into our old snuggly, connecting routine. We read a lot together and play board games.

I'm also having him do some 'school work' in workbooks. He does about five easy math problems once a day during the week (too easy if you ask me -- I know he could do harder stuff and part of me wants to give him harder stuff to challenge him, but I also want him to feel successful and to not associate "school" or "homework" with this awful horrible terrible thing). And the one he hates the most is handwriting. I also have him do a front and back page in a writing workbook. This takes a super long time -- sometimes includes tears, wasting time and general outrage. Sometimes he insults me, too.

I think it is his challenges with fine motor skills that are preventing him from enjoying the experience. So I bought him a couple of ergonomic pens that are supposed to cause less hand strain. I wish there was a pencil alternative.

And I don't know if I'm supposed to be working on printing with him or cursive. Going into fourth grade next year means writing in cursive, but he barely knows how to print legibly.

Hmm.

A New Chicken Fence

It took me awhile to remember to pull out the camera. As you can see, my friend Jesse and I were already on to the concrete by the time I whipped it out.

But FIRST ....

1) we removed the old standing- though-rotting-but-still-had character fence and any garbage in the area and dug our little trench.
2) we used a post-holer (which proved not so necessary) in the areas we wanted a metal t-bar post.

3) my roommate, Steve, ran to a non-profit garden down the street to borrow their "donk" to pound the t-bars in.
4) we pounded the t-bars in without a tape measure to determine the exact locations for the posts (this is important later.)
5) we attached chicken wire to the t-bar with baling wire.

6) we realized that we couldn't attach the screen door for the run to the metal t-bars. uhhhh. so we improvised by attaching 2x4's to the metal t-bars with .... more baling wire!

7) we mixed up concrete and gravel and added it around the metal posts and along the trench, burying the chicken wire so nothing (especially my adventurous and annoying puppy) could dig under the fence.


8) and then we tried to screw the door to the wooden boards ...


oops.

9) so my roommate Steve came out and the men put their heads together (snort) and came up with a plan. A very successful one, I might add.


(my son got in the way of the finished shot ... but you can see the end result of Steve and Jesse's tinkering. Mighty fine.)


Aubrey, Steve, Robert and Jesse standing proud.
And Emma and Hazel are in the back scratching at a new area. We expanded the length of the chicken run, so this was new ground to cover!


Me and the kids posing with Jesse.

I Know We Say This Every Year ...

... but I think Spring has come early this year!



My Comice Pear tree sprouting a top-knot of a bud!



Our lapins cherry tree.



New growth on the blueberries! Maybe I'll get to eat them this year!
(the chickens snarfed them before I could get to them last year..)



Hydrangea



Raspberries



... and loads more potential for the coming months!



In addition to the new trees I planted, I added some rosebushes to the front garden along the street. A peace offering for the neighbors that don't like our front yard garden.



Here's a wee apple tree I planted this year to match the other columnar apple in the front. Maybe we'll get apples off the bigger one this year?



I laid some straw in the chicken run to cut down on Spring's mud.




Now I just need to get to the weeding.

Oh Yeah! NaBloPoMo.

pshh.

i forgot again.

:)

it's the 2nd of march already and i didn't post anything yesterday.

i'm deciding this isn't an omen or a portent of doom. i have not already failed at National Blog Posting Month.

i injured my neck on friday. i stretched in bed and it cracked. (*shudder*) yeah. i laid there for awhile not moving. i hobbled out of bed to call my chiropractor and he couldn't fit me in for 2 1/2 hours!

i was adjusted two different times that day, iced it and biofreezed it. i totally laid low for the weekend and it managed to stop spasming by the end of sunday.

monday was ok, just stiff and sore. but it felt good enough that i could maybe consider having someone massage it ... later.

i went to yoga this morning (bikram yoga rocks) and just laid in the heat and did a few poses and didn't do a whole lot more. i modified a chunk of them and by the end, i felt a little less stiff and like there was a whole lot more oxygenated blood pushing through there. (*relief*)

a couple more days of modified hot yoga and another chiro appointment tomorrow and a light massage on thursday, and maybe i'll be ok.

friday i help dig a trench, use a post-holer, and staple chicken wire. also screw hinges and latches.

but maybe i'll just let my friend do all the work and buy him beer and pizza instead of risking it.

yeah. that'd be good.

i could shake pom-poms, too.

or maybe it'll rain on friday, and we (read: he) won't do it at all.

or maybe he'll get the job in CA and move and i'll never see him again.

Myriads of Topics

So, I've been cleaning. And this is my beautiful, slightly more organized garage.

Despite this, the mice are back. Eeew. Paul and I saw one last night while we were watching a movie, so we set some more traps. Bummer. It's been months since we've had any. I thought they were all gone. For good. But no.

I got two of the bastards in traps this morning. Then Humphrey (our six month old puppy) set off the other trap, so I had to move them under the sink where he couldn't sniff out the peanut butter. I'll put them back before I go to bed tonight.




This picture represents the accumulation of stuff that litters the bottom of my van at any given time. Paul cleaned out the van earlier this month and this was the result. (He's always giving me shit for how dirty my van is.)

But THIS, dear reader, is the stuff from HIS car. (heeheehee)




No more shit from Paul. Or if he does hand it to me, I can give it right back. (*insert cheesy smile*)




I'm already thinking garden. If I'm going to be planting sugar snap peas and spinach and broccoli in March, I best start thinking of ordering the seeds and preparing the ground next month. !!! It still feels like the dead of winter over here. It doesn't seem feasible to start working the ground in a few short weeks.

I'm still knitting scarves for (fill in the blank's) sake! I'm working on a yummy cream and mocha striped one right now, and learning about right side and wrong side of project.

We had a Manga/Knitting Homeschool Group here yesterday. Yes, the two don't seem to go together, but my daughter was wanting some manga buddies and I wanted some crafting/sewing/knitting time -- so we combined it. It worked fairly well actually. The kids drew some manga for about 45 minutes, then I tried teaching some Japanese language with the flashcards I'd picked up, but one of the kids already knew what I had prepared! All of it! Turns out he's been taking Japanese lessons through Human. His mom said it was better than Rosetta Stone and much cheaper ($25). I'll have to check it out for Aubrey.

Then the kids took turns playing You Tube videos of their favorite Japanese musicians and listened to some Japanese music. And we finished off the "club," as Aubrey calls it, with an episode of CardCaptor Sakura in Japanese with English subtitles.

The moms present knitted instead.

Success.

We'll be doing it next Friday, as well.




This is my very first scarf, knitted for myself, in August/September of 2009. It's super long and wide, the way I like scarves.



This one I finished for a friend at Christmas.



And this will be my next sewing project. Robert picked out this rockin' fabric for me to make him a cloak from.



Despite the kids really loving their new classes at HomeSource this term, Paul and I have talked it through and we've decided to put the kids back in school and end this lovely home/unschooling experiment. Sigh.


(kids in gymnastics class)

Strangely enough, (and I'm really so relieved) I am able to accept this change without feeling like a failure. And I don't feel like I am dumping them back into the hands of unfeeling, underpaid district employees. (Well, maybe a teeny bit.)

I started this homeschooling path because Robert wasn't getting his needs met in public school and the private school I attempted to put him in turned him down -- and everywhere else (lottery alternative schools) had waiting lists. So I stayed home with him and it was brilliant. His behavior changed, we got closer in our relationship, he became more relaxed. In fact, I had so much fun that I talked Aubrey and Paul into having Aubrey come home with us, too. And that was fun, too, for about six months. And then she got really bored.

We tried curriculum with her, but I didn't like doing it. And with Robert being unschooled, it didn't really work to do curriculum with her at the same time. Also, their ages and interests were just enough off that whatever Robert wanted to do, Aubrey didn't and whatever Aubrey wanted to do, Robert didn't. So someone was always being neglected during large chunks of the day. And that wasn't working.

Our cohesiveness started failing, the kids started hating each other and I've started falling back into, "What are we going to do today?" with my eyes wide like I'm trapped in front of an oncoming semi.

I've also needed considerable more "alone" time this past six months than I did all of last year. I've got personal challenges that I'm struggling with and a book that I'm trying to finish. So, it just feels like time to move the kids back into school outside of home. I'm both sad and excited.

Sad because an unschooling/homeschooling lifestyle still has beautiful, nurturing connotations that I want for our family. And there are so many "pros" for our family. Namely that the kids' interests are addressed more than they would at a more traditional school (even an alternative one.) For instance, between the two of them, the kids are taking Chess, Swimming, Ballet, Gymnastics and Drawing Anime. There is no way that they will get that in school, no matter which one I put them in. And if we go with a private school (which is a fairly probable possibility), we won't have the money after paying the school's tuition, for them to take more than maybe one of these "extra-curricular" activities.

And that's another thing. I hate that art and movement and dance and chess are extra. They should be the norm! They should be in every child's week (if they want them.) And I'm sad that Paul and I are effectively taking those opportunities away from our children. :(

The other really big plus for homeschooling Robert is his "extra" needs. If we opt for a private school, we may have to advocate harder for those needs, than we would if we did public school with an IEP for him. So we are not sold on which place would be best for him. We're still researching.

As it stands now, all of the lottery schools in our city have waiting lists and the lottery for next year is not until March. Not too far away, but IF they get chosen, then school wouldn't start for another nine months. But frankly I'm not holding my breath for that. I've had Aubrey in the Village School's lottery at least three times and on the waiting list once. She's never got in. I had Robert in the lottery for Ridgeline Montessori (as a sibling because Aubrey was already in Ridgeline at the time -- which meant he got priority over any slots available) and he still didn't get in. He was on the sibling waiting list. (As opposed to the regular waiting list.) Sigh.

There is a private school (Eugene Waldorf School) that has openings for both the kids right now. Barring Robert's application gets approved. So we wouldn't have much wait and could get them in this month probably.

Other options are: wait until the lottery and see if the kids get into any of the other alternative schools (tuition free) -- which is uber-nice because Paul's worried about his job stability just now. And then put them into Waldorf in March or April if the lottery schools don't work.

I have a tendency to want to hurry through to the next step when a decision is finally made.

So ... Paul and I have decided it's best for everyone involved (collectively anyway) that the kids go back to school. So, now I want to just make that happen and be on to the next part of the journey. But hurrying may be detrimental for Robert especially. When something new is offered to him, or when he's told "This is what's happening now," he digs his heels in and yells for all he's worth. :) Cheeky Monkey.

If I try to push him into a school setting when he's not ready, the first grade nightmare will happen all over again. And I don't want any more trauma for my baby.

We've got some diagnosis' in our back pocket if we want them (Sensory Processing Disorder, ADHD, and Oppositional Defiance Disorder) -- we laugh at that last one -- but more importantly we have some avenues to walk down to help him get re-integrated into a classroom. If we try to force him in next month before we start OT (Occupational Therapy) or continue HBot (if we decide to do that) or get him any counseling (which I'm skeptical of at his age), we risk it taking even longer for him to get into school without fighting at home or with the teachers and kids.

(Robert in the hyperbaric chamber -- HBOT.)



(I go in with him. The sessions last about an hour.)


(We do a lot of reading in there.)

I don't know. Robert's such an interesting little kid and he's so full of life. He really wants to make friends and maybe putting him into school would be excellent for him and he'll love it.

I feel like I need to help him with this transition though. How do I do that? Make home more like school? Talk about the things that would happen at school? Pump up the friends aspect? Take him to open houses and let him play on school playgrounds when school isn't in session?


Aubrey has SpiralScouts in a couple of hours (we're working on the Drumming Badge) and I want to soak in the tub with a book for a bit before that happens, so I'll close here. I hope this didn't fel too much like a rant. Just wanting to connect to whoever's listening ...